I am so sad that April is finally over.

I mean it was horrid that I completely wasted my entire month but then again I suppose time that I enjoy wasting is not time wasted at all. Or so you tell yourself stupid!

Anyway, I recently got invited to one of my friend's 21 birthday party and now I'm a little worried. I think its like those big party sort and i havent been socializing for about a year (not that I'm complaining I enjoy solitude waaaaay more than the average 20 year old should) and I don't know how to feel about that.

What should I get for her? What should I wear? We aren't that close at all in JC but surprisingly after graduation the whole bunch of them kept in contact with me :D. I guess I am too neurotic to think of myself as likeable but to be invited yipeee yay I'm human and prone to what is called as wanting to be part of a group so of course I'm glad hahaha.

Is it an all girls event? Why am I such a worrier? How much should my budget be for the gift? Will I know anyone there? Gah!

On a separate note, I realized that the joy of blogging is slowly seeping back into me. Hurray! That's probably because I'm such a sucky Instagram user. And dont get me started on Facebook or Twitter.

While I have friends who seem to be constantly eating good food, visiting scenic places, having soooo exciting lives to capture such moments and share, I BELONG TO NONE OF THESE MENTIONED CATEGORIES.

I eat mostly home-cooked/street food. I don't go scenic places often and even if I do, I tend to try and fully live the moment rather than scramble for my phone to snap a shot. My life is anything but exciting (though my thoughts about these matters is totally another thing) but there I've said it.

Blogger is the only social networking site that suit such a weirdo like me. It's old school and often require very little upgrading. Which is good because I don't really adapt well to stupid changes.

Tumblr is too hippie, Twitter require short funny one-liners and honestly I talk and write so much that I simply cannot shrink them all, Facebook is too mainstream (hahaha pretentious me!) and of course refer to stupid changes mentioned above and Instagram which I have tried and failed to blend in with the "cool kids".

I like the fact that I can see people's lives though. Very voyeuristic I know but hey they are the one letting others in it. Also, interesting fashion insides and those of natgeo's photographs aren't that bad. I follow National Geographic obsessively on instagram.

There are some backlash though; its like sometimes I wonder to myself what on earth am I doing as I watch my friend posing with hot guys/eating japanese fusion food/lose 10kg or something. It's pure green envy burning in me. WHY DOES THEIR LIFE ROCK WHILE IM READING SOMETHING LIKE THE OLD MAN AND THE SEA? 

This is when being part of the pioneer batch of Facebook culture helps. I joined Facebook in early 2006-2010. That was before it was everywhere. So when slowly more and more people were included in this online social media and I added my friends as friends, enemies as friends, family as friends and so on, the over loaded amount of information practically exploded on my screen.

All of a sudden, the intense exposure of everyone's lifestyle is right in front of my face.

And yet nothing actually changed.

My dynamics with them are still the same. My friends still behave like my friends when we meet up, my enemies (which I have very few by the way) still bitched about me when we don't meet up and I meet my family almost everyday so their lifestyle is almost like mine DUH! *roll eyes*

Ok I think this might sound a bit confusing but basically what I'm saying is while people might appear to have a seemingly more awesome life than yours, you don't really feel it when you actually meet them in real life.

Trust me the hype is often overrated. Seriously except for that one friend that lost 10kg its actually only about 2 in real life ok maybe 5kg why are you so fat?  

Instead, you can find me on Pinterest, Spotify and of course here! I use to have a Phiary account too but its really way back. I might consider Wordpress if I can't get a better blogskin these days but oh what the hell.

See, I can recollect my messy thoughts so much better here :) so I am going to tentatively announce that I'm back.